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  • Sunday, February 20, 2005

     

    Vomited up like a ...vomiting thing that vomits.

    When you read:

    If you read the biographies of great Christian leaders of yesterday and today, you get the sense that the majority of these guys and girls heard clearly from God, obeyed readily and started immediately reaping Taco Bell Grande-size rewards.

    ...it can only mean that Motel Messiah™ Doug Giles is on the loose again, mangling the Lord's words in pursuit of cultural validation in a world that that snickers and rolls it's eyes behind his back. Here are this week's Doug Droppings:

    In the Bible, there are huge chunks of copy where the saints’ lives and walks with God reeked worse than old spilled bong water in the back seat of a taxi in Miami during the heat of the summer

    [...]

    When Jonah ran from his call, God ran after him and used extreme measures, i.e., a violent storm, to get his attention. So much for everyone wanting to have a purpose driven life.

    [...

    I know this is not PC, but God will rock our world if we are avoiding our call. God has His ways of waking us up. Disaster comes to Jonah’s life not because of happenstance or demonic attack but because God is on the prowl. God is allowing all hell to break lose on Jonah’s world because Jonah is not taking care of business. God/life/circumstances will fight us if we’re blowing off what we were hardwired to do.

    [...]

    When we go through storms and are forced to hang out in a fish’s belly, sometimes it feels like an eternity, like we will never ever get out of the seaweed we’re in. When life disciplines us for goofing off, it can often leave us more depressed than a pimpled-faced 16-year-old boy just dissed by Lindsay Lohan.

    [...]

    I cannot relate to the perfect flawless ones who follow faultlessly their purpose in life. I find, thanks to my creepy heart, that I’m more like the guys who barely made it, who were seemingly always doing stupid junk, missing their purpose, chasing things they shouldn’t be chasing and paying retail for life’s lessons. Usually it takes a celestially swung 2x4 to get me to wake me up and back on track.


    When you think about it, "celestially swung 2x4" blunt head trauma explains so much.


     

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