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  • Friday, January 19, 2007

     

    Tina the Tipsy Spider and the Not So Very Good, Kind Of Boring, Cold Sweat and Dry Heave-inducing Twelve Steps of Sobriety

    Possibly no one is more excited than I am that Jenna Bush (she's the blond one who falls over in bars) is going to write a book:

    You can soon add the title of author to first daughter Jenna Bush's résumé.

    Whispers learns that the 25-year-old blond twin of Barbara Bush is shopping a book proposal to major publishers in New York City. We're told that the project is vague and that she's initially gauging publishers' interest. The White House wouldn't comment, but others suggested that the former grade school teacher is interested in writing a children's book or tale about her experiences
    I appreciate that she is offering to be flexible enough to write either a children's book or one about her experiences (a distaff version of Under the Volcano, or possibly an updated Looking For Mr. Goodbar comes to mind), but far too often these "experience" books by the children of our ruling betters tend to fall flat on their flyleafs; witness the failure of Mary Cheney's Now It's My Turn which contained so few hot lesbian passages that even her own mother , a woman well acquainted with meaningful glances, tentative probing fingers, and the sweet sweet nectar of an overflowing honeypot...couldn't be bothered to read it. Therefore, since Jenna isn't locked into any particular genre, may I suggest a cookbook, because everyone loves cookbooks and they make swell Christmas or batchelorette gifts.

    I'm thinking something along the lines of: The Olive, The Lime, and The Cherry: The Salad At The End Of The Bar.

    No royalties required, just mention me in the dedication....


     

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